In case you hadn’t already figured it out, we deal with money in The Tank. Money in all sorts of shapes and forms, types and sizes.  So when you hear of the economy nose diving or some Central Tank meeting to discuss what needs to be done to control this spiral, think of me, at the end of the headset and chain discussing with fellow Tankers what impact this comment or that comment is going to have on various shapes and forms of money. Then the phones hop and it’s acrylic talons at the ready:

*click* “Hello Nemo speaking? What currency? Buying or selling? Is that just one payment or do you have a number of them? Rate there at the moment for you to buy six hundred and fifty thousand GBPeriwinkles is 0.7821. Yes, it is quite strong. It’s difficult to say really, there was no particularly poor data behind yesterday’s weakness it was just a risk off day, a build up of poor sentiment, poor earning results, concerns over Euro debt crisis and signs of slowing growth from China to the US are all now conspiring to deflate confidence. Yes, yes, absolutely. I understand. Will it be better tomorrow? Well I’m not sure Seamus, I reckon if the wind changes direction and moves eastward over the gulfstream in the Atlantic at the same time as Mercury moves into retrograde, but just before the precipitation in the air reaches a level higher than 18^th August 2010 then yes, I do reckon we could see a strengthening of the Euro…but it really is just a view”

*click* “Hello Nemo speaking? What currency? Buying or selling? Is that just one payment or do you have a number of them? Rate there at the moment for you to buy seventy six  thousand USJohn Doreys is 1.2058. Yes it is quite strong. Well the Euro fell below $1.22 to the dollar yesterday for the first time since the middle of 2010. Meanwhile, equities suffered another day of losses with the ISEQ, FTSE, S&P500 and Erustoxx all extending their losses for the week. Yes, yes, absolutely. I understand. Will it be better tomorrow? Well I’m not sure Sile, bear with me there a moment and I’ll flip a coin. Heads or tails? Tails?  OK…aw sorry, it’s heads. No won’t be any better tomorrow. Do you want to go ahead with that? Hello Sile? Sile??”

*click* “Hello Nemo speaking? What currency? Buying or selling? Is that just one payment or do you have a number of them? Rate there at the moment for you to buy one hundred and fifty thousand Ozzy Ozbournes is 1.1755. Ah yeah, you’re fucked. Arse has fallen outta the Euro. Will it be any better tomorrow? Lord Jaysus fucked if I know. I’d quit while I was ahead if I were you…but don’t quote me on that”