I was deleting emails today and found an entry I'd done when Sleazy PT (Remember? The one I was using before Super PT?) was honing his skills on me... Oh how things have changed, how I've grown up! Anyway, hope you enjoy it and some of you may even recognise yourself or SleazyPT

My 5 things you need to know about Personal Trainers....enjoy!

1. Thinking of Training?

You might be completely new to the world of exercise and have no clue what you're doing at the gym. You might be in a rut of not seeing any results. Or you may be bored, in a rut and realise the most stable male relationship you've had in a while is the one you have with the local barman or cook in the chipper. Personal trainers will tailor a workout to fit your needs and tell you that they’ll help you achieve your goals. If you have a tough time motivating yourself to get to the gym or get a good workout in once you're there, look no further. For the first six months, your trainer will push you to break through all of your comfort zones, helping you get stronger along the way. After the 'honeymoon period' you may find that very same trainer a deterrent to attending the gym. We advise working on this by using our following four tips when looking for a trainer.

2. Get Fit with a Trainer Who Fits You

Look for strong credentials when choosing a personal trainer - strong arms, great abs, toned torso. Trainers might specialise in something like sports enhancement or rehabilitation after an injury. Others are likely to have a PhD in mind fuckage. Ask a trainer about his experience and what his passion is (?!) to find someone that fits your needs as closely as possible. Meet with him in person and see if there's any way you can observe him working out himself to ensure his claimed (and afore mentioned) credentials and specialism hold true. Stick with the trainer that you feel comfortable with and really connect with, even when your brain is saying MOOOVVVVEEE ON, your scales is saying FATIGUED and particularly when you spend most of your time questioning this connection and admiring his skill of mind fuckage.

3. The Price You Pay for Personal Training

Personal trainers can cost you a pretty penny. There are ways to reduce the cost of personal training, such as purchasing package deals with a trainer who works at a gym or teaming up with a fitness buddy and sharing a trainer. A good alternative is to strike up an inappropriate relationship with your personal trainer and you are likely to get a lot more training than you bargained for. A good trainer will be able to motivate two people at once without taking away from the effectiveness of your workout. Keep in mind that this may be harsh and send your female mind into overdrive as to who is the real winner, who is paying with money and who with dignity.

4. Put on a Brave Face

There's no need to be nervous as you head off to your first session with your personal trainer. You probably won't sweat much at your first session, as you won't exert yourself too much in front of this Adonis who "fits you" (see point 2)! The first thing you'll do together is discuss your goals. Be conscious of double entendres and suggestions of expanding your goals and your mind! Your trainer will weigh and measure you and go over some basic nutrition. This is where it's important to fit with your trainer as severe lack of dignity may be experienced. Alternatively these sessions can take a different approach and while he will be very intimate with your body fat, you on the other hand will just be very, very aware of it. If he has not already shown you, your personal trainer will then show you how to warm up. Ask questions to help you get more comfortable with both your trainer and the workout you're being asked to do. These are best asked at the end of the session and stick to professional questions. Questions on performance or of a more emotional nature can lead to a discomfort for both you and your trainer

5. Learn to Love Your Trainer

Many websites suggest communicating openly with your trainer so that he can meet your needs. We advise against this and experience has shown us that emotional retardation and lack of communication is the best way to conduct any type of relationship with your personal trainer. Remember that you're paying him to work for you and ensure that you spend a lot of time grappling with your conscience on this one. Follow his suggestions for the best results and learn to never trust him. A good trainer is always looking out for his best interests. He'll play many different roles in your journey together; he'll be your coach, a mentor, an object of affection, an object of passion, a fling, but most of all never your (boy)friend. Nobody is less excited for your progress than your trainer, who will never put in as much blood, sweat and tears as you have to reach your goals